Why we get depressed

Buds2go

Depression: it seems to sneak up on me I tried to hold it up back,but it always comes back especially when I have overwhelming problems. that I don’t know how to solve. tried to put them out of my mind I try to dive into some new project or thing to learn and I always have a smile on my face when I’m around other people some sometimes I wonder how they cannot feel the pain or see it on my face but most the time they cannot my cover isn’t blown. Of being happy go lucky person that likes to laugh and joke around but if I do enjoy those things.
Alot of times it’s a cover.
And it is almost impossible for anyone that has never been through any sort of spell of depression for them to understand they are either unwilling or just and cannot comprehend the pain hurt we feel. I cannot speak for all victims of depression and I do not know if we I’ll have the same triggers the best “stinking thinking”yhat feeds our depression. I only can relay my thoughts and feelings on it.and what feed mine, other people feed mine and away I am an empath I pick up one negativity and anger and I turn it on myself, because I am not the sort of person or I try never to be the takes my emotional state or so I thought. My doctor told me to Larry day like it’s your last and if it was your last day alive i would you care what other people thought. At first I wasn’t sure if she was trying to tell me I was dying of something. Then I realized no doesn’t matter what people think I know that in my head but my heart doesn’t seem to be able to tell the difference weather the pain is fantasy or reality.
4 years I just shut it off wouldn’t let anyone in close the doors to my heart fear they would hurt me I wear my heart on my sleeve I always have people seem to either see that as a weakness or something to exploit.in my experience.
About 15 years ago I had a depression that took me 5 years to help myself photos and in the end it’s not that I solved and it my problem I just keep picking too busy to focus on them I was working and going to school and once my depression lifted I swore I would never let myself get in that state again I felt it coming on I would do something to change my life. At the time of my depression I did not think it affected anyone but myself I had two young children 12:,girlthe other one was 8 boy
I very much try to stay positive around and ultimately failed. My lowest point I would fantasize about getting in the tub and slitting my wrists but at the end of my fantasy who would find me my kids so that always put a put a damper on the whole idea. That and the fact that I do not believe in suicide as a core value life is a gift whether we feel like it is or not. Around 2 or 3 years into my profession found out my daughter it started cutting herself immediately I by myself but somehow my fantasies of suicide had rubbed off on her that I was to blame for these behaviors because that is what I do I take everything negative and I put it on myself I blame myself for things I have nothing to do with me maybe in some small way I may be responsible for but I put it on myself that is my fault no matter what it is and so do other people like to blame me for the things they do mostly because I’m a A.D.D   and we are easy scapegoat . they probably did not realize the damage they do to me . internally maybe they just don’t care. and if I was in healthy mind set it might not affect be at all but instead in my darkest moments. I suck it all in hold it there.
My depression usually is by others or situation I blame myself for, I always thought by something inside of myself holds on o it and internalize it, holds it there Fester’s than grows to an all-consuming black goo of mental Anguish or that’s the picture I visualize.

I just hope by reading people will start to understand the mind of a depressed person and realize the pain they feel is every bit as real I saw someone reaching in and cutting out your . Pain is as real as any physical pain but you can take a time out for physical please what do you take for mental pain and depressants my experience with them or less than I do they either made me Placid that I didn’t care what anybody did or said or what happened to me or they made me too assertive or too aggressive and if you knew me you would know that is the furthest thing from my personality. So if you know someone who has periodic or maybe constant depression be kind don’t think they can just snap out of it cuz I can and if they do it’s a show for you it’s not a real recovery. After I came out of my depression I came to the realization depression is a selfish emotion you are so self-involved you think everything about your hurt and you can’t see past your own pain. Other peoples laughing and joking sometimes feels like there laughing at you weather they are or not .
Please don’t give up on us. We are the sensitive Souls the painters poets the writers the comedian and the most compassionate when we’re not sucked down that hole of depression. we are what makes us human being a beautiful beings in the eye  of  unversal god  but we also suffer internally we are the people when we can get it together who make a difference in this world when were not too busy feeling sorry for ourselves feeling misunderstood or alone when we can get past those traumatic feelings we have a most wonderful gifts for Humanity for this world because it is for  our us our creator has created that we are his vehicles in which love spread throughout the world but first we have to learn to love ourselves truly

But if I told you the cure for depression for any sort of disease for all all mental and physical pain that I knew the Cure you tDepression: it seems to sneak up on me I tried to hold it up back,but it always comes back especially when I have overwhelming problems. that I don’t know how to solve. tried to put them out of my mind I try to dive into some new project or thing to learn and I always have a smile on my face when I’m around other people some sometimes I wonder how they cannot feel the pain or see it on my face but most the time they cannot my cover isn’t blown. Of being happy go lucky person that likes to laugh and joke around but if I do enjoy those things.
Alot of times it’s a cover.
And it is almost impossible for anyone that has never been through any sort of spell of depression for them to understand they are either unwilling or just and cannot comprehend the pain hurt we feel. I cannot speak for all victims of depression and I do not know if we I’ll have the same triggers the best “stinking thinking”yhat feeds our depression. I only can relay my thoughts and feelings on it.and what feed mine, other people feed mine and away I am an empath I pick up one negativity and anger and I turn it on myself, because I am not the sort of person or I try never to be the takes my emotional state or so I thought. My doctor told me to Larry day like it’s your last and if it was your last day alive i would you care what other people thought. At first I wasn’t sure if she was trying to tell me I was dying of something. Then I realized no doesn’t matter what people think I know that in my head but my heart doesn’t seem to be able to tell the difference weather the pain is fantasy or reality.
4 years I just shut it off wouldn’t let anyone in close the doors to my heart fear they would hurt me I wear my heart on my sleeve I always have people seem to either see that as a weakness or something to exploit.in my experience.
About 15 years ago I had a depression that took me 5 years to help myself photos and in the end it’s not that I solved and it my problem I just keep picking too busy to focus on them I was working and going to school and once my depression lifted I swore I would never let myself get in that state again I felt it coming on I would do something to change my life. At the time of my depression I did not think it affected anyone but myself I had two young children 12:,girlthe other one was 8 boy
I very much try to stay positive around and ultimately failed. My lowest point I would fantasize about getting in the tub and slitting my wrists but at the end of my fantasy who would find me my kids so that always put a put a damper on the whole idea. That and the fact that I do not believe in suicide as a core value life is a gift whether we feel like it is or not. Around 2 or 3 years into my profession found out my daughter it started cutting herself immediately I by myself but somehow my fantasies of suicide had rubbed off on her that I was to blame for these behaviors because that is what I do I take everything negative and I put it on myself I blame myself for things I have nothing to do with me maybe in some small way I may be responsible for but I put it on myself that is my fault no matter what it is and so do other people people like to blame me for the things they do mostly because I’m a personal add and I’m an easy scapegoat they probably did not realize the damage they do to me . internally maybe they just don’t care and if I was in healthy mind set it might not affect be at all but instead in my darkest moments I suck it all in hold it there.
My depression usually is by others or situation I blame myself for, I always thought by something inside of myself holds on o it and internalize it, holds it there Fester’s than grows to an all-consuming black goo of mental Anguish. or that’s the picture I visualize.
I just hope by readiness people will start to understand the mind of a depressed person and realize the pain they feel is every bit as real I saw someone reaching in and cutting out your . Pain is as real as any physical pain but you can take a time out for physical please what do you take for mental pain

anti depressants in my experience with them or less than ideal ,  they either made me Placid that I didn’t care what anybody did or said or what happened to me or they made me too assertive or too aggressive and if you knew me you would know that is the furthest thing from my personality. So if you know someone who has periodic or maybe constant depression be kind don’t think they can just snap out of it cuz I can and if they do it’s a show for you it’s not a real recovery. After I came out of my depression I came to the realization depression is a selfish emotion you are so self-involved you think everything about your hurt and you can’t see past your own pain. Other peoples laughing and joking sometimes feels like there laughing at you weather they are or not .
Please don’t give up on us.
hink I was crazy maybe I am just doesn’t make it any less true the root of all Humanities evil humanities  equities and the cause of all physical and mental pain was :

lack of love each other our selves and until we learn how to love ourselves truly and who we truly are who we truly are and what our true purpose is once you start living for those two reasons depression will no longer exist along with a great many other humanities problems

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The

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Who’s manifesting your destiny

This is valuable information how are alphabet is in sync with sacred drawing how exactly to decode it as more knowledge than I have

but I will investigate and let you know but I find out

Is this what is meant by other words for the valuable .will they determine life brings us please figure out the value of each symbol will be better be able to understand manifest these are questions I do not know the answer to yet.

However there are some steps to manifest the station that I do know or accurate one is the I am meditation,

The idea or the concept we are all the source in the source is all us that we are all connected through our souls to be one United body in God.

Today another ways they say is to change your vibration by changing your emotions to those positive ones rather than negative love rather than hate feeling abundance rather than lack seeing the source and all others

Being grateful and thankful for what you have and dont have

Being able to visualize what you want and keep it in your mind to like it it’s all yours

Believe in yourself 4th believe in yourself believe in your intuition just believe faith is the starting point and taking action

Trusting yourself trusting your path believing you can do what you are meant to

Giving others what you want for yourself

Leaving it up to the universe on how these things will manifest

Realizing the universe is always in motion being cleaning your idea of what you want of your visualization of it being yours

Feeling at peace with your life as it is and accepting it and accepting Who You Are and loving you yourself for your Treasures and your faults

Cause and effect realizing you are responsible for the good and the bad in your life by attracting it to yourself by the way you’re thinking or feeling you can change Us by remembering put love and and understanding towards others first and foremost your mind

Last but certainly not least remembering reality is your perception most the time. the hurt you feel in life you do to yourself by your perceptions of reality. (this person doesn’t like me ,that persons talking about me ,maybe this person hurt my feelings . Feeling victomize is something you allow self to feel.these are all things we do to ourselves for it does not matter what others think of us it is matters what we think of ourselves)seek inner truth through deep meditation

These are some things you should be aware of while you’re trying to manifest your own reality

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When I started this blog I just get into acting affiliate marketing I bought into some scheme get rich quick you know was desperate couldn’t pay my rent one afford or to buy groceries. But I took 50 bucks of my hard earned money I sent it to this affillate thing they said all within a couple weeks so if you can extra $500 month.
But luckily there is a 60 day guarantee on that products two weeks and I realize that this was bullshit I was going to do this I could do it without them. But I wrote for my money back.
and I’ve been into meditation and energy healing and spirituality for a long time ever since my spell depression but will get to that.
So the first website I made was just like somebody threw up ads all over page. What’s the next one I made was a little more organized not much original content a couple different rid of side its YouTube videos on top except is self defense in survival tips and a lot of medication and sell tell videos along if you natural medicine don’t want to want to be in front of a camera I borrowed some from youtube , I’n retrospect I probably should have viewed all the way through you know ADD getter done. Connect2divine. And another one call
gogreencanada
But half the links I got for products wouldnt work.
Drove my coworkers and Facebook friends crazy just following the steps
Set out for me in utube videos.
So I had moved on to some topic important to me but I never did make a cent first or last but I did reread discover my joy for writing . I started went out when I was a young younger I started many novels being the way my mind works my mind works faster than my hand could write . my writing was atrocious my spelling and punctuation even worse as you could tell it is not much better. It was always too embarrassed 2 show anyone my story’s . another problem that I wanted to write fantastical fantasy stories but my imagination going and in to many direction .I couldn’t get all the ideas down quick enough.

I read somewhere to write what you know so when I originally started this blog
It was a means to an end to get traffic to my sites but after writing my first blog are members how much I loved writing and maybe nobody will read it and but even if one or two people if it helps anyone I’ve decided to share my journey so am I self-conscious backwards country bumpkin which I still am but the wisdom I have been granted that has helped me along the way maybe there’s one person just want even that might help them along their way.

although I work full time I had a physically and mentally challenged in job I care for the elderly I have looked care of other people all my life for 26 years now.
I could do my job in my sleep I think some days I might .and that was one thing I found it was a challenge for my brain something to challenge my brain affiliate. marketing certainly did that but unfortunately it was such a challenge how many steps to follow. But I think I will stick with the blog in I enjoy that and I might float throw in the occasional that I think might be beneficial to what I’m talking about something I would like to try or something I have tried I would like to try it I ayahuasca .
I tried to make Montonic gold or ornaments I don’t know if I actually succeeded or not try to eat it but it didn’t taste very good so I would advise if you want to try ormus maybe buy some so you know what it looks like before try to make some so least you know what you’re supposed to have in the ant that was a October’s project.
This is my personality I find something that interests me I go Full Speed Ahead learn everything I can study it talk about it what not until I’ve learned all I can learn or decided that I suck at it and go to the next .
hopefully I will stick with my writing even if it doesn’t become a popular blog or hardly anyone reads it maybe they’ll be one person that will be able to take something from it that helps and then I know I have served my purpose .

. My purpose to be a spiritual personal coach to people who need guidence on there journey or just someone to bounce there revalations off . No two people journey is exactly the same , our destination is the same.

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J…ourney

J…ourneyIn this life before we can become the the Spiritual Beings we’re meant to be, there are many things inside ourselves that we have to
face and deal with. we need to know what are the things that are holding us back from realizing our true potential
there’s always been something holding us back from realizing this in ancient days the ability to survive it is said that you have to have all your means of survival Shelter food water basic needs a survival meant before you even can entertain the idea of who you truly are. in those parts of the world we have those things Meant For Us so what is holding us back I’m discovering your true potential as human beings?
could it be those little devices that we hold on her hand and stare at all the time that we think we cannot live without? we are supposed to be the most connected generation ever but what we are the most disconnected from each other, disconnected from our souls. we are also busy watching funny cat videos , to see the person standing rite next to it little own help or service to them which is our true purpose in life to be of service to others to help each other to Guided each other. and this is what I am dedicating this website to potenal

standing together even when we are alone

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finally maybe the world is ready to face    the truth on how women have been sexually mistreated since the beginning of time we pretended our Modern Age these things aren’t as bad anymore that we are all guilty of having these things done to us and keeping them to ourselves #me too has changed all that this is to support all the women and that’s probably all of us I just have been in a situation either sex was forced upon us or we were groped inappropriately or talk to you in a sexual manner that made us feel comfortable I am confident saying as a woman that there’s not one of us that has not experienced one of these things we may not be able to stop these things from happening to us that we can change the way we react to them it is not our shame but we carry it like it is it’s time for us to stand up as one and put the shame and blame where it belongs and not on ourselves or each other we are women hear us Roar.

Connect2divine And Gogreencanada

In this life before we can become the the Spiritual Beings we’re meant to be, there are many things inside ourselves that we have to face and deal with. we need to know what are the things that are holding us back from realizing our true potential there’s always been something holding us back from realizing this in ancient days the ability to survive it is said that you have to have all your means of survival Shelter food water basic needs a survival meant before you even can entertain the idea of who you truly are. in those parts of the world we have those things Meant For Us so what is holding us back I’m discovering your true potential as human beings? could it be those little devices that we hold on her hand and stare at all the time that we think we cannot live without? we are supposed to be the most connected generation ever but what we are the most disconnected from each other, disconnected from our souls. we are also busy watching funny cat videos , to see the person standing rite next to it little own help or service to them which is our true purpose in life to be of service to others to help each other to Guided each other. and this is what I am dedicating this website to

more than one path

These are the thoughts come to me out of the blue that I think may be inspired I always is this my purpose I guess the only way to find out is to proceed I’ve been inspired to start a inward movement to meditation that affects the world beneficially only I could teach and had willing student to learned through meditation the chakras connection to our souls on that when Jesus said our bodies are temples he was being literal figurative true as chakra Soul connection a true meaning will be told to us individually but is a group if we Unite enter meditation and use the universal energy whether you want to call it the Holy Spirit God or Christ consciousness the world can be healed is life lifetimes believing in lack in fear and doubt these things are very evil comes from accept the fact all we think all we fear all we feel is not real except for love and the love of ourselves and the love of our fellow brothers and sisters that is what evil is a lack of love if we learn to love and accept ourselves and others who we truly are they truly recognize each other for who we really are not to shells and then use our minds to connect with the holy energy of the universe just think of what we could do but no one person no one consciousness least that I know of alive today to it truly achieve this only Jesus christ being of pure lite and love and through him. But We can be a catalyst for a chain reaction of events that saves us all and now I wonder if the sum how is my purpose I’ve been praying and wondering for a while if I had a purpose in life asking my soul’s for meditation asking God supposed to start some sort of group Focus all our healing energy I love on all we knew all we loved I alt we hated all who have hurt or hate us and love them I know this sounds like a fantasy but if enough people believe in the same fantasy just making it a reality quantum physics

Odes of inspiration

These are the thoughts come ay be inspired I always is this my purpose I guess the only way to find out is to proceed I’ve been inspired to start a inward movement to meditation. that affects the world beneficially only I could teach and had willing student to learned through meditation the chakras connection. to our souls on that
when Jesus said our bodies are temples he was being literal figurative true as chakra Soul connection a true meaning will be told to us individually . but is a group if we Unite enter meditation and use the universal energy whether you want to call it the Holy Spirit God or Christ consciousness the world can be healed.

But lifetimes believing in lack in fear and doubt. All evil comes from fear. accept the fact all we think all we fear all we feel is not real.
except for love and the love of ourselves and the love of our living creatures

that is what evil is a lack of love if we learn to love and accept ourselves and others who we truly are they truly recognize each other for who we really
are.
not to shells and then use our minds to connect with the holy energy of the universe just think of what we could do if we All tapped into that

but no one person no one consciousness least that I know of alive today to it truly achieve this Jesus christ being of pure lite and love and through him achieved the Divine connection . But We can be a catalyst for a chain reaction of events that saves us all .
now I wonder if the sum how is my purpose I’ve been praying and wondering for a while if I had a purpose in life asking my soul’s for meditation asking God supposed to start some sort of group Focus all our healing energy I love on all we knew all we loved I alt we hated all who have hurt or hate us and love them I know this sounds like a fantasy but if enough people believe in the same fantasy just making it a reality quantum physics//rcm-na.amazon-adsystem.com/e/cm?ref=tf_til&t=babyneedski01-20&m=amazon&o=15&p=8&l=as1&IS2=1&asins=1539748537&linkId=9a50c4f0d6cda31bfa46ef4ec3d91fa0&bc1=000000&lt1=_top&fc1=333333&lc1=0066c0&bg1=ffffff&f=ifr//rcm-na.amazon-adsystem.com/e/cm?ref=tf_til&t=babyneedski01-20&m=amazon&o=15&p=8&l=as1&IS2=1&asins=B01I05RU2W&linkId=b6c7791fe42e31aca1f5738505f9c46f&bc1=000000&lt1=_blank&fc1=333333&lc1=0066c0&bg1=ffffff&f=ifr

Connect2divine

As spiritual journey s go my has-been a long and winding back to where I started but on such a deeper level

The realization the I could not keep god in the box my upbringing and Sunday school unwittingly Put him in in my mind and with every new revelation came fear cause It wasnt included I in the main teaching until it was revealed like blind fold being remove meditation is the most amazing tool gift we can use know matter faith or no faith it is a gift very few utilize on my site I offer different tools. And knowledge the could lead you onn the most glories trip of your life

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